Have you ever felt someone's judgement after you've told them something you cared about? The tone of their voices becomes slightly higher or lower than average.
And while some try to act normal, their facial expressions shows you exactly how they feel.
A sinking feeling lying the pit of your stomach, with a hint of shame, creeps up on you. Your mind tries to figure out how you could change your story in such a way that comforts them, and relieves the tention in the room.
And everyone is holding their breath, wishing they could be somewhere else.
I find it important to talk about judgement, because people are dying from it.
I have a great deal of respect for anyone openly being themselves, because it takes courage.
We live in an era where we are allowed to be ourselves, but others think we shouldn't.
And we all know that we aren't supposed to judge eachother, but always do, including myself.
In the public eye, a suspect is always guilty until proven innocent. Just look at all the internet gangsters we have. Typing in all caps trying to force their opinion down our throat. But probably wouldn't say the same thing directly to someone.
I've noticed that I'm even cautious with telling the people around me everything.
Because I know some would judge, perhaps without even knowing it. But I am blessed to have a few that wouldn't, no matter what.
I could try to find ways to explain why we shouldn't judge. But is it really worth it?
The only advice I could give is to keep your opinions to yourself. Because nothing someone else does with their life, affects yours.
You don't know what they've been through. And who knows, maybe your comment could seal someone's fate.
I've had people tell me, with a surprising tone, that I didn't act the way I looked. And then they would stare at me with a vague expression, like I should be grateful that they've noticed that I'm somehow different.
What kind of ignorant comment is that? It tells me that we still do not see people as individuals.
Our judgement is often not even our own.
It's an opinion someone placed in your head, through media, religion, friends and family. That's even worse to me.
I can imagine that you feel some type of way, if you personally had bad experiences with people. But I have no respect for anyone who bases their judgement of an assumption. You are completely in charge of your own personal beliefs.
You're afraid of the unknown and that's why you judge. And it's easier to point fingers at others than to accept that you've got some pretty horrible ways.
To the ones who are being judged. Know that there are far more people for you than against you.
And always keep your head up high while being unapologetically yourself.
Love is so much more than just a feeling. It's a force from inside of us.
Seeing the ones you love, makes you light up from the inside.
And you become part of their energy.
Because of their presence, your mood starts to shift and you feel great when you're around them.
Love is more than just the feeling of wanting to be with someone forever. It's seeing them grow as a person, chase their dreams and prosper in life. It feels amazing to be part of that evolution.
Love is looking at someone and seeing all the beauty and potential they have inside. Noticing qualities they don't see in themselves and bringing them out. Wanting to help them become the best version of themselves.
That's why we cry at funerals. Knowing that the life of someone you loved has ended. And we feel like they have not had enough time, to experience the most out of their life.
Love is about acceptance.
Accepting the person as a whole. Loving their being and admiring them for exactly who they are.
But it's also accepting that you might not be the right fit for them. And realizing that someone else, might be able to take better care of them.
Real love means setting them free and being genuinely happy for them. Even though it does not include you.
Love is about sacrifice and being selfless.
Changing the future you had invisioned for yourself, because you want them to be part of it.
Finding ways to fit them in, because they add to the quality of your life.
Especially when you become a first-time parent or perhaps moving abroad with your partner.
What if we loved ourselves as much as we love others?
If we'd actually believe that we deserved everything we want in life and went after it.
What kind of unstoppable force would we all have? And how different would our lives be.
Allow yourself to fall in love with every aspect of you. Get to know yourself.
Love your body, which is always working hard to keep you alive. Healing your wounds and battling diseases.
Take care of it, as it takes care of you.
And do not degrade your appearance. Because your imperfections, might be beautiful to someone else.
Love and take care of your mind, because you're a genius. Take every idea you have seriously, and do not degrade yourself.
After everything you've gone through, you've made it this far in life. So be fearless in whatever you do, be grateful for what you have, and love yourself enough to go after what you want.